Putting Together Engineer

We have a slight problem at our house with things being dismantled. Three months ago, we had 5 working remote control cars. We now have one car in tact, without a working remote. All of the others have been dismantled. The list could go on. I have tried to provide David with ample opportunities to take things apart, but alas, a little boy's curiosity is greater than his 5-year old discipline. We have not yet found boundaries that stop him. He'll go for a few weeks without any incidents of taking something apart, then all within a few days, I will find several items dissembled and stashed somewhere. Once I find one, I ask him to go get any others that he's hidden, and he usually can produce 2 or 3 more. 

We've tried taking away his tools--he goes and finds Daddy's toolbox.

I've tried eliminating his "alone time" in the basement--but that's his most creative play time, so by doing that, I am pushing both of our buttons. This has not resulted in happiness at our home.

We've tried providing him with items to take apart from the "broken store" (Value Village) but those only last a few minutes.

Of course we have been upset with him and tried to set a suitable consequence. He knows it's wrong to take things apart, but he told me the other day, "Sometimes my mind wants to do it stronger than I want to obey." How's that for honesty?

I don't know what else to do, and I don't want it to be a point of contention in our home, or a reason that he feels he has to "sneak" behind our backs. I try to remember that it is his curiosity driving this, and who can fault a little boy for such strong curiosity?

So. I've stopped reacting to his taking things apart, and I am hoping that he matures into more discipline soon so this stops. For the most part, he has dissembled his toys and a few of Alina's. Only once has he dissembled something belonging to me. I have to remember that things are things, and they can be replaced. This little boy needs as much positive reinforcement as we can give him, so I try to keep it all in perspective.

In the meantime, one approach is that if I find him in the act of taking something apart, I tell him he needs to put it back together.

The first time I told him this, David's face grew red, and his bottom lip started to quiver. Trying his best to control his emotions, he declared, "But I'm a taking apart engineer. I'm not a putting together engineer! I don't know how to put things together!" It was so funny I had to stifle my laugh. And I found something that he could successfully reassemble.

Turns out he had just as much satisfaction in this "Putting together" project as he does with his "taking apart" projects. Now if only it was just as easy to reassemble the electronics. This particular piece just had screws, and it went back together nicely. But I don't know how to help him reassemble little wires, chip boards and small motors.

I'll admit that I don't like to see things taken apart when they are in perfectly good working order.

BUT--I absolutely love seeing my boy in his element. He gets excited and chatty about his work. He feels strong and capable, and he gets astonished at the tiniest details of these machines. All I can think is that this is a season of learning for David, and I want to encourage his enthusiasm.

 We've picked up some snap circuits so he can start to learn the building side of electronics, but that's the best I can offer so far.

Like one wise mother said, "I can laugh about it now, or I can cry over it for a few years and laugh about it later. What's the point of wasting all those tears?"